You can walk a circle and still look the other way…

circle walker

**The following post was written back when our father was first diagnosed with brain cancer.**

When you go through something traumatic in life, you easily question and evaluate every detail and area of your life. You begin to ask the big questions: the “what if,” the “why me,” and the “what now” questions.

Quite frankly, it’s easy to live a life filled with questions instead of just trusting. For many people who live in the world, life in general is all one big question. However, the good news is for those that live devoted to a heavenly Father, He always provides, takes care of you, and most certainly never forsakes you. In result, you live a life with the freedom of trust, and it is the act of trusting in something bigger than yourself that proves that you can make it. It’s about knowing that God has you even in the valley. If God has you on the mountain-top, then why wouldn’t He ALSO be with you in the valley?

As a person devoted to Christ, I have realized we do one of two things in times of celebration and in times of devastation.

  1. For some, it is easy to self gratify the mountain-tops of our lives — giving ourselves the credit for a job promotion, a raise, making a major purchase like a car or home. We find ourselves mistakenly taking all the credit for being able to make these big moments of life happen, rather than giving thanks and glory to a God who provides everything.
  2. On the same token, when we go through travesty, we tend to rely on our own strength. We try and try to overcome these horrible seasons without the strength and comfort our God provides.

SO WHY DO WE DO IT? Why do we claim to serve God, yet still depend on our own strength and our own energy and our own resources? What would happen if we consciously chose to glorify a God who deserves the glory no matter what season of life we’re in?

Today, we must ask ourselves: Do we even serve God with this kind of mentality? How do we even truly trust God if we never actually rely on what He provides for us? What if He has so many blessing we’ve never even tapped into or unlocked, because somewhere along the journey, we decided that we somehow can figure it all out without Him?

In my recent trial, I found myself wavering in this tension from time to time. There are moments when I truly have “a peace that surpasses all understanding” and then there are those moments when I begin to feel my faith shake and I lose sight of what could be. Some days, I find myself so secure in God’s promises and the next day I’m so fearful of my future and how will I get there.

The problem is consistency. Without consistency in your personal life, your faith and trust will also wavier. So maybe, just maybe, when we find ourselves not relying on God, we must add some consistency in our lives in order to strengthen our trust in God.

Those few moments where my faith lacks and I fail to trust God — those moments — define me more than when I do trust God.

My solution? SIMPLE. If we amp up the consistency of our devotional lives, then we can amp up our faith, our trust and our hope, so that it outweighs every doubt we could ever have.

You can go through a trial, walk a full circle, travel an entire 360 degrees, but when traveling in circles, you always arrive right back in the same location where you initially started. All this to say . . . although physically you may  be in the same spot, you can choose to change your perspective. You can walk a circle and still choose to look the other way — you can choose to “set your eyes on things above.”


Jessica Gauthier
Jessica Gauthier is currently age 24. She is a Licensed Assemblies of God Minister and works as the Assistant Intern Director for Mainstream Leadership College at Faith Assembly of God. Currently pursuing a degree in communications, her long-term goal is to one day own a youth camp. Jessica gets her sense of humor, hard work-ethic, and innovative hands-on skills from her father Frank.


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